bittersweet.

In recent days my heart has been aching...aching over the here and now-suffering, pain, hardship, and aching for the heavens and earth to come. My precious grandmother is somewhere in between. After over a year of strange sickness she thought was related to food allergies and a loss of over 30 pounds (she is at around 85 pounds), we found out her once cured hormone cancer has come back with a vengeance. It has metastasized into her lungs, and abdomen, causing her to fight for her every breath. I could go into a great deal of detail, but the bottom line is she is hurting, and that makes my heart hurt. Hence the bitter part.

The sweet part is that she is the biggest fighter I know. The sweet part is that she holds onto the Savior and always has. And when he calls her home there will be an overwhelming joy and ache inside me...one for her eternal destiny and the other for mine. I long to be home too. But, of course, the timing of that is not for me to decide. For now I pray for her to be out of pain as quickly as possible, be it a comeback from this sickness or a passing on to a place where there is none.

She is my mother, she has been there for me more than my own... nurturing me, fighting for me, and exercising the power of prayer over my life. I'm so thankful we're not only blood relatives; we're heirs of Christ and adopted into the family of God. We'll never be separated for long.